It has been awhile.

Almost two years since I wrote here. Life has has its ups and downs.

New jobs, then leaving those jobs. Another friend now nlivin in our basement for the past year and a half - worked out great!

OCD wise - up and down. Recent job exasperated it, and when my stress levels are high it is bad. But in other ways I hope better than I would anticipate so always some progress.

Still feel lost sometimes in regards to what I want to do career wise, and in my life, but J guess that is the norm.

Few family changes since I last wrote: Addition of two new nephews, one on my side, one on my husband's. That brings us to 3 nephews and 0 little girlies. Unfortunately we lost my grandmother in April of 2015. Definitely a big impact on me that I don't think I have fully processed. But I'm thankful to have had her for 26 years of my life. Not many are that lucky especially when your parents didn't have you until their mid thirties.

We want children ourselves. Hopefully in the next year or two. Friends of ours are also planning for the same time frame so will be nice to have friends experiencing the same things together. Especially since none of my friends have children yet. Our biggest obstacle is just getting sorted out financially: between me leaving a job that was destroying my life, being laid off from said job for a few weeks, loss of benefits while not working, hubby's job doesn't give him benefits YET... so we've taken a major hit. Thankfully returning to the shitty job for 13 weeks when my replacement put in their notice after 8, gave me benefits for a few weeks so I as able to utilise it then and set myself up or the year prescription wise.

Mom gave me the feels the other day when she commented about hoping her and Dad are around when the boys are teenagers. Saying she hopes for a good then years. This probably would have triggered me in the past but regardless it made me feel. Feels for the thought of loosing then in such a short time, the thought of not giving then grandchildren yet, and the thought that our children might not have grandparents long into their lives. :( I know how much my Nan meant to me so I hope our children are lucky enough to have that with my parents, and hubby's parents for as long as possible. Nan was definitely one of the most important people in my life who I looked up to greatly. If I can be the woman she was in terms of kindness, work ethic, perseverance, and a long-lived healthy life surrounded by your family.... I'll be a happy woman. And a lucky one.